Archive for June 2012

[Doodles and Dragons] Faerie Dragon

[Doodles and Dragons] Eyewing

[Doodles and Dragons] Eye of the Deep

[Doodles and Dragons] Examiner

[Fiasco] Solarman

Have you seen the Asshole Project? It a charity effort to raise money for Amnesty International. They’ll do this by writing up a big book of asshole NPCs for use in Fiasco (or other games), dubbed appropriately enough, The Fiasco Big Book of Assholes. Like a monster manual for your standard RPG, but full of assholes instead of monsters. This ebook thing will be offered pay-what-you-like and the proceeds will go off to the aforementioned charity.

Anyway, one way to help is to pick a playset and write up a suitably dickish NPC for that setting. Here’s an asshole that I wrote to match a playset that I wrote, Science Comics.

Devon Fizthugh, AKA “Solarman”

“Yeah, Solarman is a capital-H Hero. He’s fighting supervillains. Monsters. All that shit. Still an asshole, though.

“Look at him on the news. I’d like to punch him in his wideass smile. He’s got too many teeth. No one built like that should wear gold spandex. You ever notice the trademark symbol on his chest next to the sun logo?

“Dude’s not really even solar powered. He’s just Devon Fitzhugh, some billionaire playboy. No powers. Just gadgets that I made for him. Now he sells ‘em – under the table – to African dictators. Not that I ever see any of those profits. Bastard kept all the patents. ‘Work for Hire’ he says. Instead, I get a pink slip and a non-disclosure agreement.

“You remember the original Solarman, from back in the 40s? Fitzhugh bought Solarman’s public persona in an estate auction. Wanted to ‘monetize’ it. Initially, Fitzhugh applied to join the Global League of Villainous Enterprises. But his accountant told him that the merchandising rights would be worth more if he went face instead of heel. That’s why Solarman became a hero. Not for truth or justice or the price of oil. Just for some sweet action-figure money.

“Shit, you know that Captain Victory is the original Solarman’s son? He was gonna call himself “Solarman II” but Fitzhugh sued. Fitzhugh will crush anybody if he thinks he can make a dime doing so. That’s Solarman for you.

“Shit. I’m rambling again. Don’t tell anyone I told you this, okay? I don’t want that asshole’s lawyers all over me.”

(Disclaimer: Solarman is not based on any real person living or dead, or for that matter on any other fictional superheroes of similar name.)

[Doodles and Dragons] Ettins

[Doodles and Dragons] Ettercap

[Doodles and Dragons] Emerald Dragon

[Doodles and Dragons] Elf

[Doodles and Dragons] Elder Orb